Sunday January 4, 2009

zealous \ZEL-uhs\, adjective:full of zeal; actively enthusiastic

Zealous - a good word for today as I attempt to zealously, for lack of a better word, embark and re-embark on so many things in my life. Obviously the first of these is keeping up with this blog. It is so good for my soul to write and I love this as an outlet. It's amazing though the pressure it sometimes causes. My family really enjoys reading it, and even Shayna every once in awhile will ask me if I have written in my blog. (Scott hopes by reading it, I think, to get inside my head better - I do tend to be a bit internal about things.) The premise of the blog sometimes causes angst - there frankly are some words that pop up that give me zero inspiration. I guess that is where my creativity needs to kick in.

As with everyone it seems, I also have a renewed committment to healthy living and exercise. This is not a new one for me but we are trying to make it an effort for the whole family. That makes me ring-leader, drill seargent, psychiatrist, chef, and occasionally very unpopular. But I'm willing to give it a go, for the sake of us all.

Speaking of unpopular, I have another path I am looking forward to pursuing zealously: a spiritual path. After much anxiety in this realm over so many years, I am feeling brave enough to forge ahead in a new direction. This will most certainly be unpopular but it is time. I sincerely hope that those affected by it most will understand and be supportive of my need to start living my life in a way that focuses on my own happiness, certainly not to the exclusion of others' happiness, but putting an end to the exclusion of my own. (A huge thank you to those - you know who you are - who helped me to gain this confidence.)

I sincerely wish everyone a fantastic upcoming year!